Originally, there was no theme to this list, but the more I worked at compiling it, the more I found things I know I'd personally love that had something to do with Jane Austen Fandom. So, the theme of my first list of good gifts for Lolis is the Grande Dame of Romance herself! As with any list, this is purely subjective. Not all Lolis or, indeed, any one, can handle scented candles, has pierced ears, reads tarot or likes history books, but this might at least give ideas for gift giving.
I'll be honest, I don't read romances usually. Jane Austen is one of the few authors who wrote books that I could stand to read. Pride and Prejudice is a favorite of mine and I'm currently rereading it before I start ...and Zombies like a good little lemming *wink*.
So, what do you give the Lolita who's just mad about Miss Jane?
10. Jane Austen's Guide to Good Manners
&hearts - Most modern readers of Jane Austen have probably read these books and wondered, "why? Why do you need a husband to go with you to visit a young, rich bachelor? Why do you need rules for refusing to marry someone? And what's with all the to-do about social class?" This book explains all that, and points out that even young girls of the day had a hard time with it. When Miss Jane's niece Anna, sent her a novel she'd written for critique, her aunt wrote back that it was wonderful, except that it ignored proper etiquette of the time! The book shines a light on what made these books truly timeless, no matter how long the attitudes have been out of style.
9. Pride and Prejudice, Marvel Classics Edition
&hearts - Comics aren't just for kids, anymore (People who took their kids to see Watchmen, I'm looking at you)! I love comic book versions of classic literature. They get kids to read and they bring new life to old favorites. This version is very stylish looking with a cover like a fashion magazine (even if Lizzie on the cover looks like she's wearing a modern prom dress, rather than a Regency frock). This is a great addition to anyone's collection and gives the novel a brilliant makeover.
8. The Jane Austen Handbook - A Sensible, yet Elegant Guide to Her World
&hearts - Okay, I'm a Second Generation re-enactor and I started in Regency Era recreation when I was still a tiny tot. I was still twenty before I could tell you what it meant for a woman to be "accomplished" in that time period (or that it meant precisely zilch after marriage). This book explains all of that, everything from Courtship Rules, to Housekeeping, to Hospitality. It has a habit of being a shade snobby and sarcastic, but its still a sublime reference for those of us who were just born too damn late.
7. Pride and Prejudice (Restored Edition DVD)
&hearts - By far, the most faithful film/TV adaptation of Jane Austen's classic. Made in 1996, it made Colin Firth a household name, with the infamous "wet shirt" scene... Um, give me a minute, readers, I need an ice water shower. *fans cheeks*
The dialogue is faithful to a blinding degree, save where it needed updating to be comprehensible to modern viewers. The costuming is so faithful, I almost expect to see the reed boning in the corsets, and the settings are luscious enough to give one cavities. As wonderfully snide and gorgeous as Colin Firth's Mr. Darcy is, Jennifer Ehle's Lizzie Bennet is his match, with a lip curl that can wither cacti at 50 paces. Every collection of period drama and historical fandom needs a copy of this, perhaps two, because heaven forbid you loan it out and never see it again!
6. Regency House Party
&hearts - It breaks my heart that I missed this when it ran on PBS, but, lucky for me, it's on DVD. I usually hate romance reality shows, but this one had a charm that the others lack. House Parties were more than munchies and dancing, back then. It was a summer-long vacation, combined with a singles retreat, expressly for the purpose of matchmaking. While that might have been all fine and dandy for people of the day, the modern singletons (and chaperones) are lost in the face of Regency morals and manners. One can't help but feel that, even in comparison to the time, this is a bit TOO faithful (you can't tell me young people going a-courting didn't break a few rules every so often). Still, it's a delightfully fluffy, at times, schadenfreudian look at finding a mate in a lost era. What a shame it only ran for one season!
5. The Jane Austen Cookbook
&hearts - Foodies and Regency aficionados alike will love this one. Two authors, a food historian and an Austenian scholar, have banded together to not only reproduce the food of the day, but to put it all in context. Freshness was key, and where and how you lived determined much of your menu. This book breaks it all down and gives a cook everything they need to serve up a meal Emma, Lizzie and the Dashwoods would know and relish!
4. Jane Austen Tank Top
&hearts - For the casual Loli who wants to beat the heat, or for an Austen nut who wants to proclaim her love to the world! The neckline is high and the straps are wide, keeping the correct modesty for the look and goes up to a 2X, with a silhouette of what is presumably Jane Austen herself, overlaid with the famous opening line of Pride and Prejudice (“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife"). It's a CafePress tank, so the level of quality may need watching, but like any Lolita garment, a gentle wash cycle or hand washing should help it last. Throw a cardigan over it and pair it with a nice skirt and pearls and it could go from the office (on a casual Friday) to the theater!
3. The Tarot of Jane Austen
&hearts - Designed with traditional tarot in mind, this deck uses the age-old Tarot symbols, skewed to her most famous works. The suits are changed to Coins (Coins/Pentacles), Teacups (Cups), Candlesticks (Wands/Staves) and Quills (Swords), with cards depicting scenes from the books. It's gotten good reviews and the reports I have on it are wonderful. If you have a Lolita friend or family member who reads the cards, or any hopeless romantic with an interest in divination, they might like this deck and its companion book, if nothing else as a charming conversation piece!
2. Jane Austen Wax Candle from Paddywax
&hearts - Perhaps not ideal for the Loli with scent allergies, but charming nonetheless. This candle is scented with the feminine and classic combination of gardenia, tuberose and jasmine, and is labeled with a quote from the author ("There is nothing like staying at home for real comfort") in a nine ounce glass jar and comes packed in a box with a label that almost looks like an old-fashioned aromatherapy prescription. It makes a great housewarming gift and gives that romantic feel to any room.
1. Jane Austen Silver and Pearl Earrings
&hearts - A good piece of jewelry can fill out any wardrobe. These delicate little earrings work with jeans, jumperskirts and wedding gowns. I could see these making a perfect gift for librarians, brides and bridal parties in a Romance Novel/Regency themed wedding, or even just for a bookish or literarily-inclined individual with an eye for style. The simple leverback earrings display a black and white woodcut of Jane herself, with a freshwater pearl each dangling from the ends. Simple, modest, yet ultimately elegant. I know I want a pair!
What would you give to to the Lolita bookworms in your life? Any favorite authors you'd want to share with your friends?
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Sorry for the delay!
Still compiling my list! I actually have too many things for the list, so I may be breaking them down by themes, or something. Anyway, I'll try and post tomorrow.
Love ya!
Brenna
Love ya!
Brenna
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Where I've been
So, why haven't I posted in so long?
Quite simply, real life trumped the rest of the world.
I haven't been able to do much of anything, and my co-ords haven't been anything worthy of showing off to people. With some luck, that will change. I have a better petticoat for one thing and, for another, a better skirt (though I still lack an appropriate blouse). In January, a dear friend died mysteriously and shockingly. So, for the longest time, I haven't felt like posting anything of substance.
Well, I'm going to try and change that soon. Tomorrow, I'm going to begin posting again, starting with, I think, a top ten wishlist of lifestyle Loli-able things I crave, memes on fashion and Lolita, and histories of the things that make Lolita what it is. There may also be book/manga/music reviews and other things, like the return of the Party Planning Posts, but that will come about when the mood strikes me.
Love ya!
Brenna
Quite simply, real life trumped the rest of the world.
I haven't been able to do much of anything, and my co-ords haven't been anything worthy of showing off to people. With some luck, that will change. I have a better petticoat for one thing and, for another, a better skirt (though I still lack an appropriate blouse). In January, a dear friend died mysteriously and shockingly. So, for the longest time, I haven't felt like posting anything of substance.
Well, I'm going to try and change that soon. Tomorrow, I'm going to begin posting again, starting with, I think, a top ten wishlist of lifestyle Loli-able things I crave, memes on fashion and Lolita, and histories of the things that make Lolita what it is. There may also be book/manga/music reviews and other things, like the return of the Party Planning Posts, but that will come about when the mood strikes me.
Love ya!
Brenna
Thursday, December 9, 2010
An apology and a review
Dear Readers,
I'm so very sorry I haven't posted recently. I've been ridiculously busy and yo-yo-ing up and down the ladder of moods. But, I felt the need to post something today, what with the Winter holidays creeping closer and closer (or having already happened or in progress, as per your faith).
I've recently rediscovered PBS historical reality shows (Manor House, Frontier House, etc.). My mother and I enjoyed these immensely when we lived together, but we were often so busy, we didn't have time to watch them. So, it's no surprise I missed out on Regency House Party.
The show takes five eligible bachelors, five eligible bachelorettes, and five respectable older ladies, and sticks them in a Regency manor for nine weeks to court, flirt, and try to live as Jane Austen's contemporaries would have. Everything is set up to be as accurate as possible, right down to who bathes when. Everybody gets a background equivalent to what they would have had in the time period, from the actual Russian countess (I think she's a real countess, don't quote me, that part's a little fuzzy) and the dashing naval captain, to the poor clergyman and the lady's companion, who are actually a teacher and a university student, to the industrial heiress and the celebrity hair stylist. Right out of the gate, though, we are reminded that this isn't 1811 and these are adults of the 21st century. The heiress insults the hostess, the boys are too crocked to greet the heiress her first night and the lady's companion and the naval captain shock everybody by falling in love and getting engaged. But, it's all ridiculously charming and I highly recommend it if you love Austen and comedies of manners!
Now, hopefully, I'll have some pictures up soon of my first presentable Lolita project, as well as preparations to do a Spoonflower review!
Until next time, this is Brenna, wishing you lots of luck, love and living space! Remember, I'm no expert, I'm learning as I go!
I'm so very sorry I haven't posted recently. I've been ridiculously busy and yo-yo-ing up and down the ladder of moods. But, I felt the need to post something today, what with the Winter holidays creeping closer and closer (or having already happened or in progress, as per your faith).
I've recently rediscovered PBS historical reality shows (Manor House, Frontier House, etc.). My mother and I enjoyed these immensely when we lived together, but we were often so busy, we didn't have time to watch them. So, it's no surprise I missed out on Regency House Party.
The show takes five eligible bachelors, five eligible bachelorettes, and five respectable older ladies, and sticks them in a Regency manor for nine weeks to court, flirt, and try to live as Jane Austen's contemporaries would have. Everything is set up to be as accurate as possible, right down to who bathes when. Everybody gets a background equivalent to what they would have had in the time period, from the actual Russian countess (I think she's a real countess, don't quote me, that part's a little fuzzy) and the dashing naval captain, to the poor clergyman and the lady's companion, who are actually a teacher and a university student, to the industrial heiress and the celebrity hair stylist. Right out of the gate, though, we are reminded that this isn't 1811 and these are adults of the 21st century. The heiress insults the hostess, the boys are too crocked to greet the heiress her first night and the lady's companion and the naval captain shock everybody by falling in love and getting engaged. But, it's all ridiculously charming and I highly recommend it if you love Austen and comedies of manners!
Now, hopefully, I'll have some pictures up soon of my first presentable Lolita project, as well as preparations to do a Spoonflower review!
Until next time, this is Brenna, wishing you lots of luck, love and living space! Remember, I'm no expert, I'm learning as I go!
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
My Tempestuous and Epic Footwear Love Affair
I can't explain it. I just don't know what comes over me. It's a fever, a pure madness that comes upon me every time I see a well-dressed lady wander past, or pass a Payless, or even simply watch a lavish period film with lots of dancing.
I'm just daffy in love with shoes.
Yes, me. The girl who would happily frisk barefoot in a field of daisies like Persephone pre-yoinking is an unabashed shoe-fan. I suppose it's like my love of blond and red hair, or slim girls, or OTT Sweet Brand. I will never have it, though I may struggle and torture myself in vain. I have huge feet, you see. I wear a size 11 narrow shoe, with long, somewhat monkeyish toes and orthopedic issues that put many fancy and artsy shoes and boots well out of my reach. Even if they fit, can I walk in them? For how long? Would I be better off just hacking off my toes like Cinderella's stepsisters or would foot-binding do it?
Most of the time, I'm in bare feet, unless I'm going to be in the grass (hello, Mr. Hookworm), or going into places that require shoes. Even when I wear shoes, unless I'm too nicely dressed to be in any old thing or being a showoff, I'm in one standard pair of athletic mary janes. My last pair was suede and was destroyed by a rainstorm at a two-week-long outdoor event, leaving me in tears, until my mother gave me a pair of t-straps. My mother is the queen of hand-me-downs. Every so often, she'll lose a few pounds and hand me a few old dresses, or will buy a fabulous pair of shoes, only to find they don't work with her broken toe (she used to be in ballet, and has a permanent lump where she broke her foot dancing), meaning I get them. So far, it's the only pair I can wear regularly. I have tons of shoes and they mostly just sit there.
I wish I could wear the others more often. I try to do so, with disastrous results. I've worn stiletto heels to LARPs, expecting to sit most of the time, only to be crippled because my meeting kept being moved and I had to trot all over.
Girls, I know some of us are shoe-hoarders. Not all, but some, certainly. I beg you, don't become like me! Buy a few pairs you can actually wear and leave it alone! Or else, find outfits for every pair and hire some people to carry your sedan chair!
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
So, you're probably wondering what the heck happened...
I promised you all a post.
I slacked off.
I'm sorry.
See, I occasionally hit a point in my year where I go all floppy. My laundry piles up, my dishes don't get done, and my emails go unanswered. I don't know why, or why it always kicks me when I think I'm doing so well.
Two weeks ago, I was okay. I made another skirt! I started my NaNo plottings in earnest! I helped clean the kitchen and bathroom! I babysat for eight hours! I was standing with one foot on a ridiculously oversized globe and a big lavender pirate-loli flag in hand, while Military Choirs sang the praises of industry and virtue, my hair blown by a breeze in ways that curly hair can't actually pull off. I was a goddamn champion! This was the kind of thing I needed to do!
And then, the morning came. And suddenly, I was all limp and lifeless, like somebody had seen my big old globe and taken a thumbtack to it. I lay in bed one morning and realized that I hadn't done shit in days. I don't know precisely when I'll be over it, but when I come back, hopefully, I'll have more to write about.
See you all soon.
I slacked off.
I'm sorry.
See, I occasionally hit a point in my year where I go all floppy. My laundry piles up, my dishes don't get done, and my emails go unanswered. I don't know why, or why it always kicks me when I think I'm doing so well.
Two weeks ago, I was okay. I made another skirt! I started my NaNo plottings in earnest! I helped clean the kitchen and bathroom! I babysat for eight hours! I was standing with one foot on a ridiculously oversized globe and a big lavender pirate-loli flag in hand, while Military Choirs sang the praises of industry and virtue, my hair blown by a breeze in ways that curly hair can't actually pull off. I was a goddamn champion! This was the kind of thing I needed to do!
And then, the morning came. And suddenly, I was all limp and lifeless, like somebody had seen my big old globe and taken a thumbtack to it. I lay in bed one morning and realized that I hadn't done shit in days. I don't know precisely when I'll be over it, but when I come back, hopefully, I'll have more to write about.
See you all soon.
Sunday, September 5, 2010
A Very Unlikely Prince Charming, or The Ogre and the Princess
(In the spirit of aristocratic ladies of bygone days and to sing the praises of my man, I offer you a fairy tale of my own devising, as a Hime Month Treat. Yes, it's a bit of shameless self-indulgence, but tomorrow's post will explain why.)
The Ogre and The Princess
A Slightly Shady Fairy Tale
By Brenna Beattie, Comtesse d'Alouet
Once upon a time, in a very dark and chilly cave beneath the forest, there lived an ogre. His hair was never cut, his teeth were sharp and his temper was so tremendously violent, thunderstorms would get distracted and come to play "lightning darts" around him when he roared. This unfortunate trait made him difficult to befriend and to live with, but the few forest elves and gypsies who could tolerate his irritability found him a stalwart, if reclusive friend. There were also the cats. Every stray cat in the kingdom knew they could come to him for a gentle pat and a bowl of chicken, even a chat if they so wished. But, being cats, they didn't linger much.
He knew princesses. Oh, yes, he knew them. "Bothersome beasts," he'd grumble, as he caught the lightning and bottled it for the fairy queen, "All sunshine and daisies and not a brain in their heads. Always getting lost, always screaming when you ask if they've lost their way, and forever trampling a soul's fairy rings. Not to speak of the princes they drag in here, and the shepherd boys and the knights and, worst of all, those seventh sons of seventh sons! They stab and they poke and they shout and they steal!" He'd never met a princess he could stand, though certainly he'd tried, and had admired some of them, the quiet ones with dark hair and shy ways. But, he always wound up disappointed when he tried to meet them.
One evening, when he was out gathering lightning with the braver of his forest elf neighbors, he chanced to see something flitting through the trees by the lake where the mermaids played. Curious, he came closer for a look. It was a girl, with long dark hair and shining eyes, playing with the owls and bats that came out in the dark of night. He would have stopped her to chat, but he noticed the glimmer of a crown in her hair and pearls in her earlobes and decided that he wasn't going to go looking to be screamed at.
"Who was that princess?" he rumbled to an elf with raven wings.
"That one?" said the elf, "She's Princess Marie-Branwen. Her father's a merman king, or maybe a selkie duke, but her mother's a lampad, the nymphs that live in the dark places of the world."
"I've never seen her before," mused the Ogre, "And where's her prince?"
"She lives half of the year by the sea with her papa," said a nosey little pixie, "but, in autumn and winter, she comes to the woods above the caves to hunt with her mother. She hasn't got a prince. Her mother won't have them snooping underground and her father won't have them muddying his waters."
The Ogre returned the next night with the elves, hoping to see her. There she was again, dressed in brilliant colors like sunset and autumn and playing marbles with pearls alongside fairy babies. He could see now that she was a little different. Her crown was set with dark, smoky gems and her pearls were all black and gray. Her gowns were embroidered not with songbirds and cherubs, but with owls and ravens. She didn't have a golden ball or a wand, but she carried a little mirror made of smoked silver and a little key made of sea glass on her belt. She smiled like the crescent moon and she laughed like a waterbird in the night, and the one prince foolish enough to wander into the glen that late at night fled when he heard her laugh. The Ogre felt a funny little tingling in his chest when she did and this was new. So new, he was a little frightened, so the Ogre lumbered home to hope that it would go away.
But, it didn't go away. The Ogre was very confused. Not only was there a funny tingle in his heart, but he felt like he'd swallowed a bucket of pixies and he couldn't stop thinking of long dark hair and black pearls washed bright by the sea. This continued long into the winter, when the lampades played in the snow and hunted in their fur habits of black, gray and white. It grew every day until, at last, the Ogre was quite angry. He roared and snarled and snarled and roared, until the snow shook and shivered down from the trees and a very confused prince came to the forest seeking the dragon making such a fuss. When he found the Ogre, the Ogre lifted him off his feet with one mighty paw and roared full in his face.
"How did you do it?" the Ogre screamed, "Did you put something in my food? Did you drip it in my ear? Tell me or I'll rip you to bits!"
"I didn't do anything!" said the Prince, "I rather like ogres, actually!"
"Then, why am I sick all the time?" the Ogre demanded, "I feel tingly and tickly and fuzzy and fluffy and all I can think of are pearls and dark hair!"
The Prince (whose name was, typically, Charming) had a Princess, with hair the color of carrots and a grin like a jack-o'-lantern, and thinking of her and how he'd promised to be home in time for supper gave him an idea. "Why, Master Ogre," said the Prince, "You haven't been poisoned! You're Starstruck!"
"Starstruck?" The Ogre scratched his fuzzy head. "I've heard of being Elfshot and Mummyrotten, but what the dickens is Starstruck?"
He set the Prince down and the Prince sat down on a rock to explain. "Sometimes, the stars hit just the right point in the sky and over your bed, and they twinkle just so. It leaves a little seed in your heart, and then one day, you see something that sparkles and flashes just right. All that light mixes together and--POW--you're starstruck!"
"Is it fatal?" the Ogre worried aloud.
"Not usually," said the Prince, "but, it's rather inconvenient. It makes your head light and fluffy and you can't think or sleep right."
"I have to put a stop to this!" the Ogre said firmly, "What do I do?"
"I'm not sure," said the Prince, "but my Princess, Jane, would know. Let me go and I'll be back tomorrow and we'll tell you!"
"Isn't there a faster option?" asked the Ogre.
"Well... You might try drinking something warm and going to bed early."
The Ogre thought this was a silly idea, but he lumbered off to bed, leaving the Prince to run home to his Princess and ask her advice.
Princess Jane listened to his story, while she dished up soup and hot sandwiches, and came up with a plan. She sent a message to her wicked stepsisters, who'd been turned into dragons for their villainy and had learned their lesson. One was still happily a dragon, but the other had a successful business as a witch for hire (fairy-godmother by appointment). The next day, they went to the Ogre and Princess Jane introduced herself.
The Ogre had not slept well and was rather grumpy, so he merely squinted at Jane and grumbled, "You're a funny-looking princess."
"Not all princesses have hair like sunshine and smile like roses," said Jane mildly. The Ogre groaned. That made things worse and now he was thinking of brown eyes and crescent moon smiles.
"What do I do?" he moaned.
"Go find the thing that started the feeling and introduce yourself, then, go talk to the dragon Matilda, who lives in the cave by the sea. She'll know how to make it stop."
The Ogre thanked Princess Jane and hurried off, eager to stop feeling odd. He found the lampades eating lunch and skating on the frozen lake. Princess Marie-Branwen was there, with snowflakes in her hair and a fluffy black fur ruff that framed her face just right.
"Hope I find you well, Your Highness," said the Ogre gruffly.
"Good afternoon, Master Ogre," said the Princess warmly, "You look a little pink in the cheeks. Are you well?"
"I'm starstruck," the Ogre muttered, "There's nothing for it but a trip to the shore to see Dragon Matilda."
"You could walk along with me, if you like," said Marie-Branwen shyly, "I'll have to go soon myself."
So, together, they walked to the shore as the trees budded pink and white with the spring. They talked a little as they went and the Ogre found that the Princess wasn't too fond of bright sunlight or hot days and rather liked long hair on a male. He confessed that he loved cats and wasn't much interested in blond haired girls. By the time, they reached the sea, the Ogre was shocked to find that his symptoms were worse, especially after she left him at the mouth of Dragon Matilda's cave. But, the Ogre was no fool. He forced himself to be respectful as he approached and bowed to the dragon and told her of his trouble.
"...And it's gotten worse!" said the Ogre, "I can't stop thinking about black fur and stars in the sky! Please, Dragon Matilda, what do I do?"
"The trouble is," said the dragon, silvery smoke curling from her nose, "that you aren't starstruck at all. You're twitterpated. Lovebirds have been singing somewhere near you and the music has infected your mind and your heart. I can fix starstruck, but twitterpated is another matter. Go and find the Princess Marie-Branwen and ask her for the smoky mirror on her belt. Stare in it until you can see three things about you that are noble and good, then go to see the Sorceress Belinda."
So, the Ogre went to the bottom of the ocean where Princess Marie-Branwen danced with the other mermaids and asked to borrow her mirror. She gave it to him with a blush and a smile and he went and sat on the rocks on the beach, staring and staring. True, he wasn't an ugly ogre and he wasn't the meanest ogre that had ever lived. But, what was noble and good about him? Well, his hair was soft, that was good, right? And he was nice to animals, when they were nice to him. And, he supposed that he was helpful enough if you didn't scream bloody murder at him.
Try as he might, he could think of nothing better about himself. He brought back the mirror and received another invitation to walk with the Princess. As the leaves turned red and amber and gold, they strolled back to the woods, arm in arm and then the Ogre set off alone for the mountain where Sorceress Belinda lived. To his complete outrage, he was worse than before. But, he forced himself to be respectful again as he told the Sorceress of his troubles.
"You aren't starstruck, you aren't twitterpated, you're in love, you silly ogre!" the sorceress laughed, "And you've only just missed Princess Marie-Branwen, who came to say the very same things! If you hurry you can catch her and tell her!"
The Ogre was very surprised, but asked, "If I do, will I be able to have a little peace?"
"A little, yes," said the sorceress, "But, love isn't always easy or peaceful. Sometimes, you may fight, or fear, or cry, or get angry. You have to work very hard, and sometimes, the working isn't enough. Sometimes, love doesn't last. But, I think it will last long enough. Now, go and catch your princess!"
And so the Ogre went and caught the Princess and told her how she had hair like a black pearl and a smile like a mirror, and she told him how he had hair like a rabbit's back and eyes like lightning. If it wasn't the most romantic courtship in the world, it was the most successful and, though they haven't always been happy and "ever after" remains to be seen, they are quite content in their little chilly cave and should still be for quite some time!
The Ogre and The Princess
A Slightly Shady Fairy Tale
By Brenna Beattie, Comtesse d'Alouet
Once upon a time, in a very dark and chilly cave beneath the forest, there lived an ogre. His hair was never cut, his teeth were sharp and his temper was so tremendously violent, thunderstorms would get distracted and come to play "lightning darts" around him when he roared. This unfortunate trait made him difficult to befriend and to live with, but the few forest elves and gypsies who could tolerate his irritability found him a stalwart, if reclusive friend. There were also the cats. Every stray cat in the kingdom knew they could come to him for a gentle pat and a bowl of chicken, even a chat if they so wished. But, being cats, they didn't linger much.
He knew princesses. Oh, yes, he knew them. "Bothersome beasts," he'd grumble, as he caught the lightning and bottled it for the fairy queen, "All sunshine and daisies and not a brain in their heads. Always getting lost, always screaming when you ask if they've lost their way, and forever trampling a soul's fairy rings. Not to speak of the princes they drag in here, and the shepherd boys and the knights and, worst of all, those seventh sons of seventh sons! They stab and they poke and they shout and they steal!" He'd never met a princess he could stand, though certainly he'd tried, and had admired some of them, the quiet ones with dark hair and shy ways. But, he always wound up disappointed when he tried to meet them.
One evening, when he was out gathering lightning with the braver of his forest elf neighbors, he chanced to see something flitting through the trees by the lake where the mermaids played. Curious, he came closer for a look. It was a girl, with long dark hair and shining eyes, playing with the owls and bats that came out in the dark of night. He would have stopped her to chat, but he noticed the glimmer of a crown in her hair and pearls in her earlobes and decided that he wasn't going to go looking to be screamed at.
"Who was that princess?" he rumbled to an elf with raven wings.
"That one?" said the elf, "She's Princess Marie-Branwen. Her father's a merman king, or maybe a selkie duke, but her mother's a lampad, the nymphs that live in the dark places of the world."
"I've never seen her before," mused the Ogre, "And where's her prince?"
"She lives half of the year by the sea with her papa," said a nosey little pixie, "but, in autumn and winter, she comes to the woods above the caves to hunt with her mother. She hasn't got a prince. Her mother won't have them snooping underground and her father won't have them muddying his waters."
The Ogre returned the next night with the elves, hoping to see her. There she was again, dressed in brilliant colors like sunset and autumn and playing marbles with pearls alongside fairy babies. He could see now that she was a little different. Her crown was set with dark, smoky gems and her pearls were all black and gray. Her gowns were embroidered not with songbirds and cherubs, but with owls and ravens. She didn't have a golden ball or a wand, but she carried a little mirror made of smoked silver and a little key made of sea glass on her belt. She smiled like the crescent moon and she laughed like a waterbird in the night, and the one prince foolish enough to wander into the glen that late at night fled when he heard her laugh. The Ogre felt a funny little tingling in his chest when she did and this was new. So new, he was a little frightened, so the Ogre lumbered home to hope that it would go away.
But, it didn't go away. The Ogre was very confused. Not only was there a funny tingle in his heart, but he felt like he'd swallowed a bucket of pixies and he couldn't stop thinking of long dark hair and black pearls washed bright by the sea. This continued long into the winter, when the lampades played in the snow and hunted in their fur habits of black, gray and white. It grew every day until, at last, the Ogre was quite angry. He roared and snarled and snarled and roared, until the snow shook and shivered down from the trees and a very confused prince came to the forest seeking the dragon making such a fuss. When he found the Ogre, the Ogre lifted him off his feet with one mighty paw and roared full in his face.
"How did you do it?" the Ogre screamed, "Did you put something in my food? Did you drip it in my ear? Tell me or I'll rip you to bits!"
"I didn't do anything!" said the Prince, "I rather like ogres, actually!"
"Then, why am I sick all the time?" the Ogre demanded, "I feel tingly and tickly and fuzzy and fluffy and all I can think of are pearls and dark hair!"
The Prince (whose name was, typically, Charming) had a Princess, with hair the color of carrots and a grin like a jack-o'-lantern, and thinking of her and how he'd promised to be home in time for supper gave him an idea. "Why, Master Ogre," said the Prince, "You haven't been poisoned! You're Starstruck!"
"Starstruck?" The Ogre scratched his fuzzy head. "I've heard of being Elfshot and Mummyrotten, but what the dickens is Starstruck?"
He set the Prince down and the Prince sat down on a rock to explain. "Sometimes, the stars hit just the right point in the sky and over your bed, and they twinkle just so. It leaves a little seed in your heart, and then one day, you see something that sparkles and flashes just right. All that light mixes together and--POW--you're starstruck!"
"Is it fatal?" the Ogre worried aloud.
"Not usually," said the Prince, "but, it's rather inconvenient. It makes your head light and fluffy and you can't think or sleep right."
"I have to put a stop to this!" the Ogre said firmly, "What do I do?"
"I'm not sure," said the Prince, "but my Princess, Jane, would know. Let me go and I'll be back tomorrow and we'll tell you!"
"Isn't there a faster option?" asked the Ogre.
"Well... You might try drinking something warm and going to bed early."
The Ogre thought this was a silly idea, but he lumbered off to bed, leaving the Prince to run home to his Princess and ask her advice.
Princess Jane listened to his story, while she dished up soup and hot sandwiches, and came up with a plan. She sent a message to her wicked stepsisters, who'd been turned into dragons for their villainy and had learned their lesson. One was still happily a dragon, but the other had a successful business as a witch for hire (fairy-godmother by appointment). The next day, they went to the Ogre and Princess Jane introduced herself.
The Ogre had not slept well and was rather grumpy, so he merely squinted at Jane and grumbled, "You're a funny-looking princess."
"Not all princesses have hair like sunshine and smile like roses," said Jane mildly. The Ogre groaned. That made things worse and now he was thinking of brown eyes and crescent moon smiles.
"What do I do?" he moaned.
"Go find the thing that started the feeling and introduce yourself, then, go talk to the dragon Matilda, who lives in the cave by the sea. She'll know how to make it stop."
The Ogre thanked Princess Jane and hurried off, eager to stop feeling odd. He found the lampades eating lunch and skating on the frozen lake. Princess Marie-Branwen was there, with snowflakes in her hair and a fluffy black fur ruff that framed her face just right.
"Hope I find you well, Your Highness," said the Ogre gruffly.
"Good afternoon, Master Ogre," said the Princess warmly, "You look a little pink in the cheeks. Are you well?"
"I'm starstruck," the Ogre muttered, "There's nothing for it but a trip to the shore to see Dragon Matilda."
"You could walk along with me, if you like," said Marie-Branwen shyly, "I'll have to go soon myself."
So, together, they walked to the shore as the trees budded pink and white with the spring. They talked a little as they went and the Ogre found that the Princess wasn't too fond of bright sunlight or hot days and rather liked long hair on a male. He confessed that he loved cats and wasn't much interested in blond haired girls. By the time, they reached the sea, the Ogre was shocked to find that his symptoms were worse, especially after she left him at the mouth of Dragon Matilda's cave. But, the Ogre was no fool. He forced himself to be respectful as he approached and bowed to the dragon and told her of his trouble.
"...And it's gotten worse!" said the Ogre, "I can't stop thinking about black fur and stars in the sky! Please, Dragon Matilda, what do I do?"
"The trouble is," said the dragon, silvery smoke curling from her nose, "that you aren't starstruck at all. You're twitterpated. Lovebirds have been singing somewhere near you and the music has infected your mind and your heart. I can fix starstruck, but twitterpated is another matter. Go and find the Princess Marie-Branwen and ask her for the smoky mirror on her belt. Stare in it until you can see three things about you that are noble and good, then go to see the Sorceress Belinda."
So, the Ogre went to the bottom of the ocean where Princess Marie-Branwen danced with the other mermaids and asked to borrow her mirror. She gave it to him with a blush and a smile and he went and sat on the rocks on the beach, staring and staring. True, he wasn't an ugly ogre and he wasn't the meanest ogre that had ever lived. But, what was noble and good about him? Well, his hair was soft, that was good, right? And he was nice to animals, when they were nice to him. And, he supposed that he was helpful enough if you didn't scream bloody murder at him.
Try as he might, he could think of nothing better about himself. He brought back the mirror and received another invitation to walk with the Princess. As the leaves turned red and amber and gold, they strolled back to the woods, arm in arm and then the Ogre set off alone for the mountain where Sorceress Belinda lived. To his complete outrage, he was worse than before. But, he forced himself to be respectful again as he told the Sorceress of his troubles.
"You aren't starstruck, you aren't twitterpated, you're in love, you silly ogre!" the sorceress laughed, "And you've only just missed Princess Marie-Branwen, who came to say the very same things! If you hurry you can catch her and tell her!"
The Ogre was very surprised, but asked, "If I do, will I be able to have a little peace?"
"A little, yes," said the sorceress, "But, love isn't always easy or peaceful. Sometimes, you may fight, or fear, or cry, or get angry. You have to work very hard, and sometimes, the working isn't enough. Sometimes, love doesn't last. But, I think it will last long enough. Now, go and catch your princess!"
And so the Ogre went and caught the Princess and told her how she had hair like a black pearl and a smile like a mirror, and she told him how he had hair like a rabbit's back and eyes like lightning. If it wasn't the most romantic courtship in the world, it was the most successful and, though they haven't always been happy and "ever after" remains to be seen, they are quite content in their little chilly cave and should still be for quite some time!
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Five Awesome Things About... Hime-Loli
Sorry, it's been so long since my last post. I've been a little unwell the past few days and finally feel up to making a post. That, and it was hard to come up with something for this month's 5AT post, which I had meant to write up on Wednesday. Oh, well! Better late than never!
So, what's so awesome about the Hime-Loli style?
5. The History
Bad reputation aside, Marie Antoinette is what most Hime-Lolis are aiming for looks-wise. The girl had everything, charm, beauty, a heart of gold (part of the reason she went bankrupt wasn't the clothes, it was all the charities she was giving to). Not to mention, a wardrobe that was simply incredible. In the wake of the 2006 New-Wave-flavored biopic about her, new interest has bloomed and "Madame Antoine" as well as her contemporaries (Georgiana, Duchess of Devonshire, among others). With the trumpet sleeves and extravagant ruffles, one hopes that these Rococo-inspired outfits would do them proud.
4. The Accessories
Oh, lordy, the accessories. If you've ever wished to be prom queen, Cinderella, Holly Golightly, or just plain wished you had an excuse to wear a tiara and drip with gems and pearls, this is the style for it. Most people wear just a tiny tiara, but, I see no reason why a larger tiara wouldn't work on those of us with a little more heft (NOTE: If anybody knows any reason why I shouldn't wear a non-mini tiara, speak up, I need to know this stuff). Pearl chokers, lockets, rings, you name it. Without overdoing it, of course.
3. The Motifs
Cinderella's Coach, Sleeping Beauty's Spindle, Snow White's Apple... If it has ever been seen in a fairy tale, you can find it on a Hime-Loli outfit. Admittedly, some of my dream coords have yet to be made (No Frog Princess, No Kaguya-Hime or Mulan, and I have yet to see a single Bride of Bluebeard), but that's not to say that a person with enough industry couldn't make one.
2. The Silhouette
While not nearly as grown-up as Gyaru or Aristocrat, there is something undeniably elegant and a bit more mature than regular Sweet. The neckline hits just a bit lower, the skirts are a bit fuller, the sleeves drape and float. The style is everything your inner girly-girl (if you have one) could ever wish for.
And the Most Awesome Thing about Hime-Loli is...
1. The Way It Feels
If you've ever wanted to be a princess, queen, or other fairy tale heroine, this is the way to go. Go ahead, wear that tiara and that over-the-top hairpiece, doll up to the nines! Even adults need to pretend, just a little bit, and why not do it in style?
I promise! Next month's 5AT will be better! Until next time, this is Brenna, wishing you lots of luck, love and living space! Remember, I'm no expert, I'm learning as I go!
So, what's so awesome about the Hime-Loli style?
5. The History
Bad reputation aside, Marie Antoinette is what most Hime-Lolis are aiming for looks-wise. The girl had everything, charm, beauty, a heart of gold (part of the reason she went bankrupt wasn't the clothes, it was all the charities she was giving to). Not to mention, a wardrobe that was simply incredible. In the wake of the 2006 New-Wave-flavored biopic about her, new interest has bloomed and "Madame Antoine" as well as her contemporaries (Georgiana, Duchess of Devonshire, among others). With the trumpet sleeves and extravagant ruffles, one hopes that these Rococo-inspired outfits would do them proud.
4. The Accessories
Oh, lordy, the accessories. If you've ever wished to be prom queen, Cinderella, Holly Golightly, or just plain wished you had an excuse to wear a tiara and drip with gems and pearls, this is the style for it. Most people wear just a tiny tiara, but, I see no reason why a larger tiara wouldn't work on those of us with a little more heft (NOTE: If anybody knows any reason why I shouldn't wear a non-mini tiara, speak up, I need to know this stuff). Pearl chokers, lockets, rings, you name it. Without overdoing it, of course.
3. The Motifs
Cinderella's Coach, Sleeping Beauty's Spindle, Snow White's Apple... If it has ever been seen in a fairy tale, you can find it on a Hime-Loli outfit. Admittedly, some of my dream coords have yet to be made (No Frog Princess, No Kaguya-Hime or Mulan, and I have yet to see a single Bride of Bluebeard), but that's not to say that a person with enough industry couldn't make one.
2. The Silhouette
While not nearly as grown-up as Gyaru or Aristocrat, there is something undeniably elegant and a bit more mature than regular Sweet. The neckline hits just a bit lower, the skirts are a bit fuller, the sleeves drape and float. The style is everything your inner girly-girl (if you have one) could ever wish for.
And the Most Awesome Thing about Hime-Loli is...
1. The Way It Feels
If you've ever wanted to be a princess, queen, or other fairy tale heroine, this is the way to go. Go ahead, wear that tiara and that over-the-top hairpiece, doll up to the nines! Even adults need to pretend, just a little bit, and why not do it in style?
I promise! Next month's 5AT will be better! Until next time, this is Brenna, wishing you lots of luck, love and living space! Remember, I'm no expert, I'm learning as I go!
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Catch-Up Day Post: Harvest Punch and the Trial Run of the Ghostbuster Skirt
Harvest Party Orange Spice Tea Punch
1 part ginger ale or lemon-lime soda
3 parts orange spice tea, brewed and cooled
Pour the cooled tea into a bowl or pitcher, then add soft drink slowly. Chill with ice or ice cubes made of apple or orange juice.
&hearts *~ &hearts ~* &hearts
So, I finished the skirt and discovered to my dismay that something had gone horribly wrong. When I measured it, it was the perfect length to be worn with a petticoat. Then the petticoat I was making turned out to be a hot mess. It will probably be gutted and reused in other ways later, but there's no way it's going to give any lift to a skirt. So, I dug out my senior prom petticoat, tucked it up just so, judged it to be the right amount of poofy and tried the skirt on. Somehow, it had GAINED 2-4 inches of skirt. I don't know how or why, but they were there. Now, I'm a tall girl, with a long body, a waist that nips in an inch above my navel (which I'm told isn't normal) and long legs. I probably need a longer skirt than others anyway. But this skirt reached past my knees. I wore it anyway, to see how it would behave in a public setting. It's a bit too bland right now and I'll have to fix it, but it's good for a start.
My mentor D. suggested a few things and I'm probably going to take it off the waistband, stiffen the waistband, add an overlay of orange tulle and maybe some other punky accents (safety pin card symbols, a gray patch pocket, etc.). I considered making a pleated wrap skirt as per one suggestion, but that's been a nightmare to plot out so, probably not. I'm going to take a few inches off and lengthen the ruffle, at least, and see how that hangs.
1 part ginger ale or lemon-lime soda
3 parts orange spice tea, brewed and cooled
Pour the cooled tea into a bowl or pitcher, then add soft drink slowly. Chill with ice or ice cubes made of apple or orange juice.
&hearts *~ &hearts ~* &hearts
So, I finished the skirt and discovered to my dismay that something had gone horribly wrong. When I measured it, it was the perfect length to be worn with a petticoat. Then the petticoat I was making turned out to be a hot mess. It will probably be gutted and reused in other ways later, but there's no way it's going to give any lift to a skirt. So, I dug out my senior prom petticoat, tucked it up just so, judged it to be the right amount of poofy and tried the skirt on. Somehow, it had GAINED 2-4 inches of skirt. I don't know how or why, but they were there. Now, I'm a tall girl, with a long body, a waist that nips in an inch above my navel (which I'm told isn't normal) and long legs. I probably need a longer skirt than others anyway. But this skirt reached past my knees. I wore it anyway, to see how it would behave in a public setting. It's a bit too bland right now and I'll have to fix it, but it's good for a start.
My mentor D. suggested a few things and I'm probably going to take it off the waistband, stiffen the waistband, add an overlay of orange tulle and maybe some other punky accents (safety pin card symbols, a gray patch pocket, etc.). I considered making a pleated wrap skirt as per one suggestion, but that's been a nightmare to plot out so, probably not. I'm going to take a few inches off and lengthen the ruffle, at least, and see how that hangs.
A New Month, A New Theme!
Happy September, everybody! While there were only three votes for September's theme, we had a tie breaker and this month's theme is... HIME-LOLI! Thanks to everybody who voted and, indeed, to all my readers! There won't be a poll for the next while because I was actually smart and planned for October and November. Those being my busiest months (NaNo prep and NaNoWriMo), I planned ahead.
Coincidentally, this is also my birthday month, so there maybe some silliness with me wearing tiaras. It's a weakness. No matter how classic or punk I am, I'm a Sweet Potato Queen at heart (I'll talk about them later in the month) and I adore tiaras!
Since I was a slackass, today is going to be a catch-up day. I'll post the last of my posts for the August party theme and report on the sewing project, which has by no means reached its conclusion, but will probably be on hold for the foreseeable future (meaning the next couple weeks).
For those of you going back to school, I wish you lots of brain power to study on and lots of happy memories for later. To everyone, I wish you lots of luck, love and living space! Remember, I'm no expert, I'm learning as I go!
Coincidentally, this is also my birthday month, so there maybe some silliness with me wearing tiaras. It's a weakness. No matter how classic or punk I am, I'm a Sweet Potato Queen at heart (I'll talk about them later in the month) and I adore tiaras!
Since I was a slackass, today is going to be a catch-up day. I'll post the last of my posts for the August party theme and report on the sewing project, which has by no means reached its conclusion, but will probably be on hold for the foreseeable future (meaning the next couple weeks).
For those of you going back to school, I wish you lots of brain power to study on and lots of happy memories for later. To everyone, I wish you lots of luck, love and living space! Remember, I'm no expert, I'm learning as I go!
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