We live in an intricate world. The media and our peers fire conflicting messages at us, tangling us up in knots while everybody fights the war of individuality vs the status quo. It's not like the Lolita lifestyle is much easier. We pine for a simpler, more archaic life, while we rush to lay hands on the latest gadgets so laden with plastic roses and crystals and gumdrops, it's a wonder we can still lift them and drench ourselves in fantastical confections of lace and ribbon. It's no wonder more people are reporting anxiety disorders and depression these days (not that the past was all that rosy, but we have names for most of it now). Everyone is exhausted!
Is it any wonder things like yoga and meditation are so popular these days? We need time to slow down and recharge. Sometimes, we just need to turn back to the simple and let all the convoluted elements of our life wait.
If you've read some of the posts here on SFL, you know I'm a bit of a hippy. It's my weakness, I'm afraid. I'm willing to believe six impossible things before breakfast, seven if you catch me while I'm still in bed. But, meditation has been proven to have physical and mental health benefits beyond calming you down. Don't believe me? Look it up! You can probably find more reliable sources than the ones I have linked, but I trust these guys. To sum up for the link-phobic: Meditation has been shown to improve perception, boost compromised immune systems, and, of course, reduce stress (which can lead to all manner of other health problems).
Now, don't fall prey to the stereotypes. You know the ones: holy men and women chanting in the midst of nature in perfect lotus position. You don't need to spend years in a convent in the mountains to be able to meditate. To give an example: when I was in high school, the county (possibly the state, it's hard to remember) instituted a "moment of silence" before the Pledge of Allegiance for prayer and quiet contemplation. I'm a little uncomfortable with public prayer, but I would use the time to calm down before the most stressful class of the day. Somehow, I always had either math or a really tough elective in the morning, so, I could bury myself in a few moments of peace at least before I got slammed with the really tough questions like "If a is 111, what's a(4+6)". And, funny enough, just focusing on some blissful wilderness scene in my head and thinking of quiet music made my grades just a little better. It wasn't until college, where there was no reminder to put on the breaks and cool down, that I had a meltdown.
Here are a few simple meditation exercises I've started using that you can try:
--Find a time of day when you have at least five minutes uninterrupted. Set a timer, if you must, but put it where you can't see it or keep checking the time. Sit or lie down comfortably and picture someplace quiet and happy. Don't be concerned with what other people think should be happy. Your "happy place" could be a grove of birch trees in the snow or a graveyard at midnight, or even an abandoned warehouse. If it makes you feel safe and peaceful, explore it in your mind. Wander around, touch things and make note of how they feel and sound and smell. Maybe leave a little gift for the other people who might visit or just to remind yourself that this is a sanctuary.
--Find or make a string of beads. Make it your own, with charms, favorite colors and stones. Don't worry about matching it to any outfits, just make it personal. Then come up with a word or set of words that have deep meaning to you. They can be as simple as "peace" or "love", as timeless as a familiar prayer or the Litany Against Fear from "Dune", or even a few lines of poetry or an affirmation, like "I am beautiful, clever, and loved". Make sure it's something you remember easily. Whenever you have a five minute period to yourself, take it out or hold in it your pocket and recite those words you've chosen, using the beads to count or just holding them and thinking of how they make you feel. Don't worry if you lose the beads or they break. You can make another, but it's simply a symbol to keep you grounded in reality.
--Choose a pebble or a shell or some other small trinket. It could be something you found in nature or some souvenir from somewhere. Keep it with you or simply envision a small object like that in your mind. When you feel the pressures of your life getting to be too much, imagine pouring all the tension and worry and negativity into the object. Picture the object as a machine of sorts, taking the gloom and frustration and cleaning it up, recycling it into positive feelings and energy, or even just burning it away to nothing, leaving you with nothing but calm, pleasant feelings.
Now, don't overdo it, or run out and sign up for Kundalini Yoga. Like any good thing, misusing or overusing it can be harmful. Kundalini syndrome comes to mind. If you think meditation might help with any serious issues, talk to a medical or psychiatric professional first. Don't start digging into the heavier stuff without seeking professional help first. If you have a religious tradition you belong to, ask a clergy member or faith counselor about methods of meditation or prayer you can try and if there are ways to do it safely and unsafely. Also, don't throw out your medications just because you feel better now that you're doing this. Meditation is not a cure for anything, just a treatment.
There are other ways to simplify your life. Too much laundry to do? Next time you do a few loads, decide on which items you can live without, don't really wear anymore, or otherwise no longer want. Give them away to friends, sell them or donate them. you may find that your dream print collection can be pared down to a single jsk or skirt and, really, how many colorways of a single print do you need? Living space a mess? Try just picking up 15 things a day and putting them where they belong, for three weeks. Not only will you pick up the habit, but you'd be amazed how much of a difference 15 things can make. Can't decide what to eat for dinner? Try eating something simple, like a bowl of breakfast cereal, or rice and beans every so often. It'll clean out your palate and give you an easier time choosing what delicious dish you feel like having tonight. Face keeps breaking out? Try using a few less products or go old school with your cleansing regimen. I broke down and started using just cold cream, straight rosewater for toner, and a honey and oatmeal scrub when I'm really desperate. Generations of women can't be wrong (the Romans were using a recipe very close to our modern cold cream).
The simple things allow us to better enjoy and appreciate the complexities of our lives. Whenever I catch myself getting cynical and grumpy, I sit back and take a moment to enjoy the underrated pleasures of life. Then, when I've had that time to regroup and recharge, suddenly I'm feeling so much better about the whole world. Try it out some time. You may be surprised how much confusion you can do without.
Until next time, this is Brenna, wishing you lots of luck, love and living space! Remember, I'm no expert! I'm learning as I go!
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